Are you suffering from the perfectionist syndrome?

What is Perfectionism? Perfectionism is defined as a meticulous drive to attain excellence. A perfectionist is one who has this characteristic.

'Perfectionism' is the most prevalent belief in our civilization. Notice that the word 'belief' was used.

Everywhere in this world of ours, perfectionism is regarded as good and desirable while imperfection is deemed as bad or negative. Everybody wants everybody else to be perfect. Bosses want their employees to be flawless on the job. Parents want their kids to be the best. Perfectionists want their work and themselves to be perfect.

Since it is so strongly regarded as being positive, is Perfectionism really an absolute or universal value? In my opinion, it is not so. To me, it is relative and is born of human conception. Perfection is an idea. It is an idea of a perceived ideal state of affair. However, things are the way they are. For every circumstance, the truth is what is at each instance. Perfection and imperfection are therefore merely attached values.

I am not suggesting that perfectionism is not good. I am suggesting that perhaps perfectionism can cast a controlling net over our expression of happiness. One can reach the required goal with or without being a perfectionist. To be a perfectionist, on the other hand, leave very little room for one to accept and love oneself unconditionally when the desired goal is not met. And when our desires are not met, we feel unhappy or cannot be fully satisfied. However, the truth is we only have each moment of the Present Moment to live in. By being perfectionist, our mind will be forever planning and thinking about the future or lamenting about what went wrong in the past. Because of these tendencies, many perfectionists are unable to feel satisfaction because in their perception they never seem to do things good enough to warrant that feeling of contentment.

From this, we can see a paradox of life. That is:

"How can one have perfect peace, self-love, and joy when one is a perfectionist? "

For information on how to overcome the perfectionist syndrome, contact me at or via email at

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Monifa Grant is a Self-Development Coach. She is the founder of The BOLD Life where she helps her clients to achieve their personal and professional goals.

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